“Better have your ham and eggs first." (Chap. 8)


Would you like some eggs and ham?

No, I do not want some, John-I-am.

Would you have some for the case?
To get you ready for the chase?

I will not have some for the case.
There’s grouse and oysters for the chase!
I do not want them, John-I-am.
I do not want the eggs and ham!

Would you like them in the cab?
Here’s a plate for you to grab!

I will not have them in the cab.
There’s nothing there I want to grab.
I do not want them, John-I-am!
I’m too full up for eggs and ham!

Say! On the wharf?
Here on the wharf?
Would you, could you on the—?

Just get on the damn boat, Watson.

But would you eat them while afloat?
Would you eat them on the boat?

I will not eat them while afloat!
I will not eat them on the boat!
The fugitives are on the run!
I’m trying to aim my bloody gun!

You have no time, so you say,
But try them and you may.
Try them and you may, I say.

Fine!
Though they’re not at all appealing.
Look! The eggs are all congealing!
Oh dear God, please give me air.
Now here comes the mal de mer...

[Sounds of unseemly retching.]

Oooo…
Watson. I did not want them for the case.
I did not need them for the chase.
I did not want them on the boat!
I did not want them while afloat!
Afloat… Oh God…

[More sounds of unseemly retching.]

(Urrrgh…) I really hate you, John-I-am.
You’ve turned me green with eggs and ham.